I sit here in the early morning light remembering over thirty years ago after walking my dog Sasha in a local park, finding a litter of newborn kittens inside a fallen log. I can’t take credit for the find- Sasha alerted me to their existence and it was a foggy, Southern California morning and the kittens were huddled together for warmth. There was no adult cat in sight, so I took the wee ones, bundled them up in my coat and took them home.

When my then husband, Don came home from work that night, he found me in tears- all the kittens had died.

Back then, there was no instant help available. Local vets were not knowledgeable about the tiny ones- they were schooled with only kittens of 6 months of age or older. There was no Internet, no ap on the phone- no one to call. Despite all I did, and I did it ALL wrong- the kittens faded.

I swore that day that I would learn all I could about these newborn kittens and other cats and when the chance came to share my knowledge, I would do so gratefully. And thus, my path was set and over the ten years of our marriage, both Don and I worked side-by-side trying to help the abandoned ones that God placed in my path. The man back then was as patient as a saint and he tried to help as best he could. Just like the man today is helping me with these cats and kittens.

Pippi picked up on my restless spirit last night. I could barely sleep, thinking about Don and our once life and remembering days of long past that led me to the journey of today.

Pippi is eating, she took her meds. I am now crushing them up and mixing them with baby food along with the other supplements- pet tinc, vitamin c and powdered deer antler. She has refused the raw chicken livers and I can’t blame her for that one- but the other kittens love the raw livers so they won’t go to waste. I won’t eat them liver in any form is just yucky!

And so Life goes on in spurts and sputters and the day is starting. Time to get the cats fed, the dog fed, the husband fed and then there are deadlines to meet as well. Three articles due in three weeks- but that’s okay, I have many muses here to inspire me-

Pippi’s diet:
2/3 raw meat
cod liver oil
1/3raw milk
dusted with vitamin c powder

No more kitty crack for this baby!

I was married before many years ago for ten years. Don and I were good friends first then we became a bit more. But when you lose a child, something happens between couples and sometimes no matter how strong you think your love might be- it can’t always triumph in the end. We have kept in touch over the years and he never remarried.

He usually calls on Christmas and this year, I didn’t hear from him. He had just undergone another open heart surgery in July and called me soon after but then nothing.

When I thought about him the other day, I felt strange about it- not connected I guess and I knew in my heart he was gone. I don’t know how I knew, I just did. I called his phone but all i reached was dead air.

Tonight, I searched for his obit on the web and found it. He died, in September. Although he was a bad boy- a typical hippie when I met him, he was a kind soul and only started going to the dark side after the death of our son. But I think he never accepted the death and who could blame him for that. My hope is that in the end, he found peace with God and now he and Jeremy are reunited and he has peace at last.

Goodbye Don, I am sorry I didn’t get to say a proper goodbye to you. I will miss you and I pray you are wrapped around our little boy right now and catching up on all you missed out on. I will miss you old friend, you should have lived longer than just 58 years.

Last night Pippi spent the majority of time wrapped around my hand sleeping. My hand kept going asleep and waking me up, yet should I dare move it, she would emit several of her squeaky meows in protest. Several times while trying to remove my hand, she would reach out and scratch me.

I have been researching Dry FIP and this is what I am finding out: Dry FIP shares the same symptoms or signs as Wet FIP with the exception of the large sac of fluid that develops in the wet version. FIP is a relatively new disease, first being discovered in the 1960’s. Some experts believe that this disease mutated from a strain of gastroenteritis that hit pigs in the 1950’s as the symptoms mimic each other- but no one really knows where it came from.

It is no longer just found in North America, FIP is now a worldwide concern. FIP is a coronavirus and cats come across it on an almost daily basis. Most cats have adequate protection against it,those that don’t catch the virus and it mutates inside of them. Some strains are highly infectious during certain incubation periods, some sleep inside the system and wake up when stress becomes a factor.

The symptoms of FIP are: fevers that are sporadic in nature, meaning that the cat can go in and out of a feverish state instead of being feverish for days- they can maintain a fever for a few hours then it will dissapate. There is a decline in the level of activity and the appetite goes away, they develop eyes issues just as Pippi has and masses start to appear on the kidneys and on the lymph nodes.

As the disease progresses, the cat will lose motor functions of their limbs, become neurologically disconnected and even show periods of rage or aggression. Small lesions are found on the tongue and inside the nose and throat. The kittens are susceptible to pneumonia and hepatitis.

Right now, Pippi only shows the symptoms of the discolored eye and she has been in fever twice.

As Pippi sits here next to me in the quiet of the morning, I hear her purring. I look into her eye and I see the smudge has expanded. It now sits on the bottom of the eye and forms a pyramid of discoloration that is now starting to cover part of her pupil. There is no active discharge and I wonder if the eye was the pathway for the infection? She has no signs of fever, her temperature is normal. She submits to this invasive check of her body temperature now as a matter of course if I follow up the intrusion with a special treat; a cream cheese ball rolled in organic catnip.

She is quieter regarding activity then yesterday, but she is hungry and eats all of her kitty crack I dish out for her.

I am recording The Pippi Chronicles as one reader has tagged this section of my blog- so I have a chart of her day as we both journey into this unknown territory for both of us- this Dry FIP. A way to measure her progress (or lack thereof) and leave behind a record of what was tried, what failed, what worked and how long a kitten can live with dry FIP without truly suffering. If I thought for one minute her quality of life was fading, I would find the funds necessary to do what needs to be done- but for now, she is in the day and ready to meet it on her terms.

Should someone in the future find themselves unlucky enough to face this disease, my hope is they will stumble on this blog and find comfort, coping and help through my meanderings. I do know that as Charles R. Swindoll once said: “It helps me if I remember that God is in charge of my day- not I.”

It is fitting that she has a pyramid in her eye now- after all, the Egyptians of ancient times worshipped and adored their cats, just as I adore Ms. Pippi.

If you look you will see her right eye which is normal catches the flash of the camera- her other eye, that is smudged just lies dormant- as if there is no life within except for alien life-

She has discovered a new game that she uncovered last night. Yesterday was laundry day and there was a pile to get through. As I kept dumping warm clothes from the dryer on the bed, Pippi would find ways to tunnel through them. Folding the towels and blankets would often find a kitty claw snagged on one end. I told her once that she wasn’t helping, but she just looked at me with her lazy eye and blinked as if to say; “No mom, you are wrong. I help you a lot!”

There was an empty laundry basket at my feet and her ping pong ball was on the bed. She swatted it and it landed in the basket. She dove after it and spent the remaining hour leaping in and out of the basket playing catch the ball. I managed to fold the rest of the clothes without her “help” and get them put away.

Every day she faces, we both gain a better understanding of each other and what is possible with a little faith. Corrie Ten Boom once said; “Faith sees the invisible, believes the unbelievable and receives the impossible.” This morning as I watch her take up the game again, I wonder if she is really sick- and I find my smile again.

Michael swears that while he was in the doctor’s office and puppy was in the truck alone- puppy was well-behaved and didn’t chew anything! I think Mike needs new glasses!

He has the toy in his mouth and beside him Promise and Reese are awaiting their turn on the line.

She greets me this morning with a short meow of hello. In the dim light of day, I see she has moved off the bed in the night and is now perched on top of the stacked cat cages. She meows again in greeting. I snap my fingers twice and she gracefully leaps off her perch and onto the bed.

As she headbumps me, I marvel at her grace and dignity. This mere slip of a kitty. We exchange rubs and pets and she shows me she is ready to face the day and all the challenges it might bring. Her comical stare becomes serious as she looks at me full on as if to say “And by golly! You better be ready too!” She trills and tweets but she doesn’t twitter. She displays ultimate faith in me and confidence that I know what I am doing when it comes to her care. We play a bit with nekoflies but her heart isn’t in it at the moment, she is hungry. I open up a can of Kitty Crack and her tail raises- she loves her fancy feast!

She eats it all at my feet as I sit recording my thoughts before the day begins. She starts to move across the room doing her morning business and hunting for any pesky bugs unlucky to find their way into the bedroom.

Yesterday to my surprise, she brought me a worm (and not of the parasitic type) it was an earthworm and she didn’t damage it or torture it. She just laid it at my feet and looked at me as if to say “I think you know what to do.”

She crouches by the screen door greeting the others. I am sad knowing that she will never be able to join them, but glad that she is still with us this day-

I don’t believe I will ever understand why God gives me the path of responsible rescue of these wonderful kittens and then removes them suddenly from my grasp.

Pippi being diagnosed with dry FIP based on the strangeness developing in her eye baffles me. There are no concrete tests for this disease- it has been around for ages and it is merciless-claiming all in its path, not something even one cat has proven to outlive. There is no discharge from the eye, just this gravy like substance pouring out of her one eye.

She stopped eating temporarily but I borrowed a pet mouse from a neighbor and put it (in its cage) inside the room and now the mouse is back safe with his little boy and Pippi is eating again full force.

She is, based on all the “experts” pounding their wisdom into my brain- “a kitty on death row.” But for me, she is a sweet, sweet seven month old tortie girl with a comical look and an enduring character. So what if she has a funny eye? Who among us is perfect?

So, do I follow man’s wisdom and let her go, or do I bow to a Higher Authority, the One who really decides the life and death cycle- the One Who Really Matters? In my opinion, it is never wise, easy or practical to play God, when we are in the overall scheme of things simply human.

On the Scotty front- this morning, after a rousing prey time with nekoflies, I sat in the room with all three kittens; Reese, Promise and Scotty laying relaxed nearby. Scotty is going to be a monster and I mean that physically not character wise. His legs are thick his paws are huge! He dwarfs Promise and she is by no means the runt of any litter!

He is handsome this little boy and of course when I stood up he darted back under the futon. But is is small steps that I celebrate and yesterday, all I saw of him was his head and on paw. It was so nice to see him in his entirety and marvel at his gorgeous mackeral tabby pattern.

Her symptoms are no longer dormant. This morning she has refused food and her temperature has spiked. Her eye which yesterday was more of a normal green is now again an angry orange color- whatever woke it up, the mutated virus is taking hold of her and she will be leaving us soon.

I talked with my FS who said she will make a housecall and put her down for us. It is not monies I can spare at the moment so my hope is the medications she is on will buy her some time. She doesn’t want to leave her bed at the moment and will raise her head up and meow weakly at me. I have been assist feeding her today but she doesn’t much like that idea.

I know there is an experimental internasal compound available but it is virtually not tested completely, controversial not to mention a bit pricey and in this area not easy to get a hold of-

So for now she waits, on her comfortable bed. I hope she can kick the fever that unexpectedly hit her out of the blue. For me, she is no longer just the cat in the bedroom- with the symptoms accelerating, she is now a kitty on death row and I am so incredibly sad at thinking of losing her so soon-

My day begins with three, short angry bursts of meows floating down the stairs. Suspect it is Scotty who is upstairs with Reese and Promise. I roll over and look at the clock and groan- 1:00 a.m. At least, I went to bed early at 8:00. I was so tired from re-organizing Scotty’s room so next time he trashed it, very little damage would be done to it. Add to that yesterday was clean and scrub all litter pans day so I was plumb worn out by the end of it all. I had hoped the man caves I left upstairs would alleviate the early morning wake up call. Apparently, this didn’t work. Just as I daily seek refuge with the Lord, I had put several safe places in the room where Scotty could also rest and feel safe. He’s not with the program yet.

Yesterday late in the day, I went upstairs to feed the kittens and I couldn’t find Scotty at first. I panicked a bit, remembering Hook and his escape, but then I calmed down my breathing and took a hard look at the room and began a systematic search. I found Scotty huddled inside one of Mike’s old fireman boots! The boots were tucked back into a closet.

Yesterday morning when I played with them with Nekoflies- all I saw of Scotty was his paw out from under the futon. This morning, half of him appeared to join in the prey time. Still not fully trusting me and afraid I might hurt him, he is reluctant to show himself yet.

I put the toy away safely and spread out the food on their bowls. Turning off the light, I settled down on the floor and just waited. The only light in the room was the hallway light and after about 30 minutes, all the kittens were out and exploring and playing. I stayed quite still, keeping my eyes halfway closed when Scotty looked at me. Although he made a wide berth around me every time he passed, he still felt less threatened then yesterday. They didn’t eat while I was sitting there. Reese, Scotty and Promise were more interested in the cats who had converged outside the screen door. I smiled into the darkness as Scotty’s journey started on a pretty good note.

Today I need to take Donovan back to the vet. They performed an “Oops” with his surgery and instead of tucking the sutures back inside of him, they left one outside. Yesterday when I saw him walking a bit funny and working on his rear, I took a look and noticed one long stitch wrapped around his testicle. At first, it resembled a round worm- but when I got the flashlight out and really looked- I saw it was a suture! Hopefully, the clinic isn’t closed today and they can rectify this mistake before it becomes infected.

Congratulations to Marg for winning the Cat Owner’s Home Veterinary Handbook-

Thanks Marg for participating and for working in your corner of the world with other cats in need.

This month, the winner will receive Darlene Arden’s wonderful book The Complete Cat’s Meow-

Again, you only need to comment on this blog sometime this month to be eligible for the drawing-

And now if you will excuse me, Scotty’s journey is beginning. I have isolated him upstairs so I can begin the socialization period for him and given the look of the room he is in this morning (he totally trashed the room!) LOL He is going to be a tough nut to crack! This is the kitty who was shoved into a letter box and left to die in a near-abandoned steel yard and found only by the grace of God and given to me. It is no wonder he is so anti-social and untrusting.

Read about this next prize here:

Complete Cat’s Meow